One of my favourite TV programmes is Miranda – a sitcom about a thirty-something woman who found joy in life everyday, despite the expectations of the world around her to be “normal” – personified by her Mother, who was never happy unless her daughter was on the brink of marriage. Miranda ran a joke shop, enjoyed galloping, broke into song at every (often inappropriate) moment, relished her own company, and was in love with the beautiful chef next door, Gary.

I love her character because she doesn’t hide her flaws, despite her mother’s embarrassment, and is content to find her own path in life. On TV this is easier to do, of course. In real life, not so much as we live in a world of expectation and conformity.

A year ago today my heart broke into a million pieces as my Dad passed away. I share this not to seek sympathy, but simply because it is, of course, front and centre of my world today and has shaped my thinking as I write this. He was nothing like Miranda, or her irrepressible mother. He did, however, manage to create a container of positive expectation about what I would achieve in my life, without dictating what it was. It was unsaid that he expected me to do the best I could, to forge a life that was worthwhile, secure, full of learning and success, as his was. What he never did was to lay out a defined path for that. He supported my choices, even though I know they aren’t the ones he would have made, and was a quiet and solid anchor in my life.

Why the sudden segue into my Dad from Miranda? One of the jokes repeated every episode was when Miranda’s best friend, Stevie, donned a Heather Small (her of M People) mask and sang:

“What have you done today to make you feel proud?”

Colleagues in my team will know I have a cardboard cut-out of that same mask (see pic above) and I retrieve it every now and then when we are in need of it. And that is how it came into my head today. My Dad resembled Heather Small in no way at all, however the sentiment feels right for today. I can imagine that he would be happy for me, for the life I have chosen, if I am able every day to confidently answer that question.

Forgive the somewhat personal reflection today, but I hope it is of relevance to all. If a day feels like it’s going off kilter and you need a best friend to hold you back up, think of Heather Small ;-). And gallop!

Juliet Flynn, Organisational and People Development